Parents: How to Address Youth Mental Health

4 January 2022

|

Tags: Parents

|

Categories: Resources

Parents: How to Address Youth Mental Health

Youth, in general, lead challenging lives full of commitments and fast-paced activities. Because of these, there seems to them very little time for self-care. However, it is important to balance out the stressors in their lives. This is where family support is essential.

Parents play a vital role in helping their youth to better structure their lives. It is important for parents to understand their children’s mental health and to identify their emotional needs.

Depression and anxiety are the two most common mental health conditions among youth. According to the Singapore Mental Health Study conducted in 2016, 1 in 16 Singaporeans experience Major Depressive Disorder in their lifetime and 1.6% experience Generalised Anxiety Disorder.

As parents, it is crucial to take note of certain signs and symptoms to watch for in our children and obtain timely help. Mental health conditions are considered medical conditions, and do not simply fade away by themselves, if left untreated.

 

Depression

Depression as a mental condition is a vastly different emotional challenge to just getting depressed. One can get depressed over a situation or somebody’s actions for a short period of time. In contrast, depression is a serious medical condition that can lead to a stage that is life-threatening, if not treated promptly and successfully.

 

Symptoms of Depression

Common symptoms of depression include sleep disturbance, changes in appetite, low moods, problems with concentration, a loss of interest in one’s usual activities, and feelings of worthlessness. Suicidal thoughts are present in some cases. The symptoms are persistent and last at least two weeks.

 

Types of Depression

There are three main types of depression:

  1. Major Depressive Disorder (MDD), in which symptoms last for at least two weeks.
  2. Dysthymia, in which symptoms last for at least two years.
  3. Bipolar Disorder, in which there are alternating moods with symptoms of mania and Major Depressive Disorder.

 

 

Anxiety

Suffering anxiety is very different to simply being anxious. Temporary anxiety due to a danger or unpleasant experience is a normal emotion that anyone can experience – this helps us avoid danger. However, anxiety disorder is a prolonged medical condition that needs medical treatment. Early diagnosis helps avoid the development of a chronic condition.

 

Symptoms of Anxiety

There are four areas to consider when identifying symptoms of anxiety disorders. Firstly, there are physical signs, such as increased heart rate, shortness of breath, muscle tension and dizziness. Secondly, there are emotional flags, including excessive worry, feeling on edge or panicky, and a sense of helplessness. Thirdly, there are mental symptoms, like negative thoughts and difficulty focusing. Finally, there may be behavioural changes – avoidance of people, tasks or situations, and experiencing troubles with sleep.

This list is not exhaustive, and each person experiences anxiety differently. However, if your child experiences persistent, excessive, and irrational anxiety, it is best to seek medical advice, as well as treatment if necessary.

 

Types of Anxiety Disorders

There are six types of anxiety disorders:

  1. Generalised anxiety disorder, which comes with constant worry and fear.
  2. A specific phobia, having excessive fear of a particular object or situation.
  3. Social anxiety disorder, with intense fear of being criticised or embarrassed in public.
  4. Panic disorder, with recurring panic attacks.
  5. Obsessive compulsive disorder, with unwanted intrusive thoughts.
  6. Post-traumatic stress disorder, experiencing overwhelming stress from a traumatic event.

 

Various factors can cause depression or anxiety disorders; often, it is a combination of reasons. There are biological and psychological risk factors. Genetic factors include an imbalance in brain chemistry or hormones, while psychological factors could be stress, childhood experiences, the individual’s personality, or addictions.

That said, family plays a vital role in helping youth to face challenges successfully and to alleviate the adverse effects of stress and anxiety.

 

What can you do?

Parents who are attentive in daily interactions with their children are often the first to recognise behavioural changes. It is important that when parents observe the abovementioned symptoms, they reach out to their children.

Good listening skills will foster a close relationship with your children, letting them know that you are non-judgemental and understanding. With this approach, children will be more likely to open up to you.

 

 

Reaching out to your teenage children can be a daunting task, especially if they are unwilling to speak to you. Hence, providing a safe space for your children to speak is crucial. If they are not comfortable, a third party – such as a close mature family member, a mentor, or a mental health professional – can be helpful.

Parents should spend quality time with their children. Acknowledging their feelings is important in building rapport and demonstrating empathy, allowing youth to feel safe in sharing their emotions and identifying what triggers these feelings.

When approaching your children for a conversation, look for a relaxed space, maintain eye contact, and show concern and interest towards their wellbeing. Asking them open-ended questions such as “how was your day?” can encourage elaboration, compared to close-ended yes or no questions. In this way, parents can help children to gain a deeper understanding of their own concerns. Parents can paraphrase and summarise to show attentiveness and ensure they are truly understanding their children.

When speaking with their children, parents need to stay calm, be supportive and provide positive feedback to avoid invalidating statements. Your teenagers may share something that you might disagree with, but try to withhold judgement and avoid asking too many questions, lest it be overwhelming for your children and they start to close off. If you observe or hear suicidal thoughts, express your concern, share what you observe, encourage support and offer help if needed.

It is common for parents to experience sadness, fear and worry in response to a young person’s mental issues. Parents need to take care of themselves and create their own support network. Local mental health resources include services offered by family doctors, polyclinics, Family Service Centres, school counsellors, private and social service organisations.

 

This article was contributed by Clarity Singapore, and is written by Sanjeevi Fernando.

Advent: The Coming of the Lord

16 December 2021

|

Tags: Educators, Parents, Students

|

Categories: Homilies / Messages, Reflections

Advent: The Coming of the Lord

Happy New Liturgical Year! Advent marks a new year in the Catholic Church. This is an important time of spiritual preparation for Christmas. Just as we prepare for the glorious joy of Easter with Lenten fasting and penance, so do we prepare to celebrate the birth of Christ with the quiet contemplation of Advent.

“Advent” is derived from the Latin ad venio, “to come”. This liturgical season anticipates the Adventus Domini, the coming of the Lord. The sublime secret is that Christ is already here: He has been present in Mary’s womb since the Annunciation on 25 March.

Pope Benedict XVI taught us in his book Dogma and Preaching:

“Advent” does not mean “expectation,” as some may think. It is a translation of the Greek word parousia which means “presence” or, more accurately, “arrival,”, i.e., the beginning of a presence. In antiquity the word was a technical term for the presence of a king or ruler and also for the god being worshipped, who bestows his parousia on his devotees for a time.“Advent,” then, means a presence begun, the presence being that of God. Advent reminds us, therefore, of two things: first, that God’s presence in the world has already begun, that He is present though in a hidden manner; second, that His presence has only begun and is not yet full and complete, that it is in a state of development, of becoming and progressing toward its full form.

His presence has already begun, and we, the faithful, are the ones through whom He wishes to be present in the world. Through our faith, hope, and love He wants his light to shine over and over again in the night of the world.

That night is “today” whenever the “Word” becomes “flesh” or genuine human reality. The Christ child comes in a real sense whenever human beings act out of authentic love for the Lord.

 

Advent is also a time in which we call to mind Christ’s Second Coming and prepare our hearts to receive Him at the end of days. We look forward to the resurrection of the dead, and the life of the world to come, with the restoration of all creation ending our exile in this vale of tears. Various Advent traditions include the Jesse tree, which traces salvation history through Jesus’ genealogy; the Advent calendar, with a surprise for each day we count down to Christmas; and the Advent wreath, with candles representing Hope, Peace, Joy and Love. Does your family practise any of these traditions? They can be both a fun and prayerful way to anticipate the magnificent celebration of Christ’s birth.

A beautiful Advent prayer is the St Andrew Christmas Novena, which encapsulates a deep longing for God’s arrival in the dark night of a world in need of a Saviour, a world hungering for Love. This Advent, let us be open to God’s quiet presence amidst the hustle and bustle of life, making room for Him to be born in our hearts so that we may bear Him to every person we meet, irradiating their lives with joy.

 

St Andrew Christmas Novena

Hail, and blessed be the hour and moment
at which the Son of God was born of a most pure Virgin
at a stable at midnight in Bethlehem in the piercing cold.
At that hour vouchsafe, I beseech Thee,
to hear my prayers and grant my desires.
(Mention your intentions here)
Through Jesus Christ and His most Blessed Mother. Amen.

Exemplary Teacher: St Albert the Great

15 November 2021

|

Tags: Educators

|

Categories: Reflections, Saints

Exemplary Teacher: St Albert the Great

The teacher is like the candle which lights others in consuming itself.

– Giovanni Ruffini, Italian poet (1807-1881)

 

You have most likely heard of St Thomas Aquinas, the brilliant Dominican friar who wrote the Summa Theologiae, a compendium of all of Catholic theology. But do you know he was taught by St Albertus Magnus – Albert the Great?

As a young member of the Dominicans or Order of Preachers, Albert taught theology throughout Germany. In 1245, he became a Master of Theology and then a full-time professor in the University of Paris, where Aquinas began to study under him.

Albert was the first in medieval Christendom to produce commentaries on all of Aristotle’s writings, introducing Greek and Arabic science and philosophy to Europe. He was also a keen botanist, biologist, mineralogist and astronomer, studying the natural sciences. He is thus recognised as one of the 36 Doctors of the Church, as the Doctor of Science and the Universal Doctor, because of the depth and breadth of his knowledge and teaching. The word “doctor” is Latin for “teacher”. The Doctors of the Church are saints who made significant contributions to theology or doctrine through their research or writing.

Aquinas’ fellow students teased him for being rotund and reticent, calling him “The Dumb Ox”. Albert overheard them and said: “Ox he is, and his bellowing in doctrine will one day resound throughout the world.”

Building on his mentor’s work, Aquinas produced the pinnacle of scholastic philosophy, the Summa Theologiae, systemising Catholic teaching in harmony with Aristotelian principles, a profound marriage of faith and reason, the fruit of three decades of collaboration between Aquinas and Albert.

In 1260, Pope Alexander IV appointed Albert as the Bishop of Regensburg in Germany. Though he occupied an esteemed position, Albert refrained from owning or riding a horse, in accordance with his order’s vow of poverty. He walked all over his considerably large diocese, earning him the affectionate nickname “Boots the Bishop” from his flock. He also founded the University of Cologne, Germany’s oldest university.

Albert passed away on 15 November 1280, six years after his star pupil Aquinas. His body was discovered to be incorrupt upon exhumation three years after his death. Albertus Magnus is a patron saint of scientists, philosophers and students.

Reflecting on Albert’s life, we see how he gave glory to God through his vocation as a teacher, encouraging his students like Thomas Aquinas to reach their full potential and even surpass him. He was not just academically gifted, but also had a pastor’s heart, faithfully tending to the members of his diocese despite the daunting distance on foot. He is a shining example to teachers everywhere, to maintain the virtues of humility and charity while serving God, being a model of Christian discipline and bringing out the best in their students. From Albertus Magnus, we learn to appreciate God’s handiwork throughout all creation, from the tiniest plant or mineral to the glorious stars in the heavens.

 

Prayer to St Albert

Dear Scientist and Doctor of the Church, natural science always led you to the higher science of God. Though you had an encyclopedic knowledge, it never made you proud, for you regarded it as a gift of God. Inspire scientists to use their gifts well in studying the wonders of creation, thus bettering the lot of the human race and rendering greater glory to God. Amen.

Unity in Diversity: The Feast of St John Lateran

9 November 2021

|

Tags: Students

|

Categories: Reflections

Unity in Diversity: The Feast of St John Lateran

Just as people often mistake vibrant Sydney for Australia’s capital city, instead of quiet Canberra, many mistake St Peter’s Basilica for the pope’s cathedral. In fact, the cathedra or seat of the Bishop of Rome is found in the Cathedral of the Most Holy Saviour and of Saints John the Baptist and John the Evangelist in the Lateran, more commonly known as St John Lateran.

Founded in AD 324, when the emperor Constantine gave part of the Roman palace of the Laterani to Pope Sylvester I, the church is the oldest and highest ranking of the four papal major basilicas, holding the unique title of “archbasilica”. The word basilica comes from the Greek basileus, meaning king. St John Lateran is the oldest public church in the city of Rome, and the oldest basilica of the Western world. On its front wall is a plaque inscribed with the words SACROS LATERAN ECCLES OMNIUM VRBIS ET ORBIS ECCLESIARVM MATER ET CAPUT: “Most Holy Lateran Church, mother and head of all the churches in the city and the world.”

Dedicated by Pope Clement XII on 9 November 1735 to “Christ the Saviour, in honour of Saints John the Baptist and [John] the Evangelist”, St John Lateran’s titular feast is the Transfiguration of Christ on 6 August. As the seat of the Holy Father (the Chair of Peter), the archbasilica is a potent symbol of Christian unity under the teaching authority of the Pope, just as Jesus exhorted the Jews to obey the scribes and Pharisees who had teaching authority signified by the Chair of Moses (Matthew 23:2-3).

 


The façade of Archbasilica of St John Lateran

 

Jesus prayed fervently for unity among His followers, while sweating blood in the Garden of Gethsemane the night before His death (John 17:11). Sadly, this has not truly come to pass, with the numerous divisions between Catholics, Orthodox and Protestants throughout the centuries.

Even among the apostles there were disagreements and divisions, as with Paul and Barnabas (Acts 15:39), as well as Peter and Paul (Galatians 2:11), but the apostles had robust discussions and came to an agreement at the Council of Jerusalem (Acts 15). From the apostles, we have received the faith handed down (traditio) through centuries under the unbroken line of papal apostolic succession.

In school, we are often assigned group work, to learn how to cooperate with others in producing a unified piece of work. It can be frustrating when one thinks the others are going about things the wrong way, or when the others are lazy and leave one to do all the work. But the ability to discuss projects honestly and clearly is a crucial life skill.

Humanity has been able to survive through all sorts of adverse situations because as a species, we are able to collaborate and create better living conditions, which would be impossible to sustain individually. Every day, we cooperate with family, friends and strangers – doing the housework, organising meet-ups, following road rules, and so on. We build on the infrastructure fashioned by our forebears.

 

 

Our schools run smoothly because there is a symbiotic relationship between the members, with teachers imparting knowledge and modelling virtues to students, and other staff supporting the entire enterprise. Through our schools, we are connected with our alumni families, a history of generations formed through Catholic education, who grow up to serve in the wider community. May the Feast of St John Lateran remind us that, as the 12th century theologian John of Salisbury said:

 

“We are like dwarfs sitting on the shoulders of giants. We see more, and things that are more distant, than they did, not because our sight is superior or because we are taller than they, but because they raise us up, and by their great stature add to ours.”

 

Let us strive to be worthy of the gift of education bestowed upon us by our parents and teachers, using it for the good of others and for the glory of God.

John Paul II & the Importance of Friendship

22 October 2021

|

Tags: Educators, Parents, Students

|

Categories: Reflections, Saints

John Paul II & the Importance of Friendship

For many who graduate from school, what endures beyond the grades and accolades is friendship. True friends share in each other’s joys and support one another through challenging times; they help each other grow in virtue, knowledge and maturity. St John Bosco, an educator of street urchins and founder of the Salesians, counselled:

“Fly from bad companions as from the bite of a poisonous snake. If you keep good companions, I can assure you that you will one day rejoice with the blessed in Heaven; whereas if you keep with those who are bad, you will become bad yourself, and you will be in danger of losing your soul.”

 

Pope John Paul II, born Karol Józef Wojtyła – whose feast is on 22 October, the day of his papal inauguration – knew the importance of friendship as a young man. The German Nazis and Russian communists invaded Poland during his university days in 1939; the university was shut down and he was forced to work as a manual labourer, quarrying limestone. During that time, he met Jan Tyranowski, assigned by a Salesian priest as a student mentor. Jan introduced Karol to the Living Rosary youth groups, which continued to meet throughout World War II, keeping the faith while their priests were imprisoned.

Karol soon discerned a vocation to the priesthood, and Jan managed to attend his ordination on 1 November 1946 before dying of tuberculosis. As a young priest, Fr Wojtyła formed youth groups as his friend Jan had. These young men and women went hiking, attended retreats, and put on plays, despite being in a war zone. In these groups, the youth found freedom which was denied them by the oppressive regime which had seized control of all institutions, including schools. Through the apostolate of friendship, they were able to cultivate human flourishing in the midst of violent turmoil, helping one another grow holistically.

 


A young John Paul on a hiking trip. Source: voiceofthesouthwest.org

 

The word “friend” comes from a Proto-Indo-European word meaning “to love”. Pope John Paul II wrote in his book Love and Responsibility:

 

“Friendship, as has been said, consists in a full commitment of the will to another person with a view to that person’s good.”

 

This echoes St Thomas Aquinas, who said, “Love is to will the good of another.”

In fact, what Jan and Fr Wojtyła did reflected what Jesus Himself did during His earthly mission. He gathered a group of friends around Him (John 15:15), teaching them about God the Father through His words and actions. These friends of Christ spread the Word of God throughout the world, inviting each of us today to join them in becoming friends of God. The most effective evangelisation is based on a solid foundation of friendship, where one receives the love of God through a friend. How can you share God’s love with your friends today?

Celebrating the Jubilee of Blessed Nicolas Barré

21 October 2021

|

Tags: Educators, Parents, Students

|

Categories: Events, Saints

Celebrating the Jubilee of Blessed Nicolas Barré

This evening, the Infant Jesus Sisters invite everyone to join in the celebration of Holy Mass commemorating the 400th anniversary of the birth of Blessed Nicolas Barré, the founder of their order. Mass will be live-streamed online on YouTube, celebrated by Fr Derrick Yap, OFM.

Today’s feast concludes the jubilee year of the fourth centenary of his birth, a celebration which began last October 21. Nicolas was born the eldest of five children to Antoinette and Louis Barré on 21 October 1621 in Amiens, France. He was their only son; they probably expected him to take over the family business.

However, educated by Jesuits from the age of ten, Nicolas witnessed their prayerful life integrated with charitable action; the Jesuits provided free lodging for poor students. The Jesuits were a missionary order sending priests all over the world to share the Gospel. Nicolas was inspired to be a priest.

 

Serving the Poor

Instead of joining the Jesuits, he decided to become a Minim, living among the poorest people in town and serving them throughout the epidemics, famines and wars of mid-seventeenth century France. Their motto, Caritas, later influenced the spirituality of the “Charitable Teachers” assembled by Fr Barré: the Infant Jesus Sisters.

Fr Barré was a noted philosophy and theology lecturer, as well as director of the library at the Minim convent of Place Royale, Paris, France. He witnessed the terrible poverty of the people of Paris. During a period of illness, he prayed and reflected that many social ills were the result of youth lacking education, and hence a sense of purpose and direction in life. Fr Barré decided to invite two young women, twenty-year-old Marguerite Lestocq and eighteen-year-old Françoise Duval, to help teach impoverished girls. Three other ladies soon joined the work, known as “Little Charitable Schools”.

 

Growth of the Mission

After four years of running these small schools, Fr Barré invited the teachers to live as a religious community under the care of Divine Providence: the Charitable Mistresses of the Schools of the Holy Infant Jesus.

He wrote: “We should live in a state of complete dependence on grace, and however great the gifts and effects it produces, we should always focus on God Who is its source. As to our good deeds, we should remember that it is God Who deigns to act through us.”

Summoned back to Paris by the Minims, Fr Barré discovered that news of his schools had spread, and a wealthy woman, Marie de Lorraine, invited him to open more with her financial help. Together, they founded ten schools and a small hospital.

In time, the Infant Jesus Sisters became an institute of pontifical right with communities in five continents, educating children throughout the world. Fr Barré was consulted by St John Baptist de la Salle, who founded the Institute of the Brothers of the Christian Schools to educate boys.

 

Arrival in Singapore

When founding the LaSallian St Joseph’s Institution in Singapore, Fr Jean-Marie Beurel wrote to the Infant Jesus Sisters in France, asking them to send missionaries to start a girls’ school. The sisters arrived in 1854 after an arduous journey by ship, and founded both a school and an orphanage for babies abandoned at their “Gate of Hope”.

The sisters trusted in God’s providence, teaching by day and supporting themselves as embroiderers by night. Their mission expanded to Japan in 1872 and Thailand in 1885. In Malaya and Singapore, they established 83 schools. Today, there are eleven Convent of the Holy Infant Jesus (CHIJ) schools in Singapore.

The CHIJ badge, designed by French students in 1894, bears the motto Simple Dans Ma Vertu, Forte Dans Mon Devoir: Simple in My Virtue, Steadfast in My Duty. It is a reminder to persevere in one’s responsibilities despite all challenges.

An IJ education forms students holistically, building their characters for the lifelong love and service of God and others. As the hymn to Father Barré says: “Touch many hearts to follow in your footsteps/To dedicate their lives to youth and poor/… to make Christ known and loved.”

At Blessed Nicolas Barré’s beatification in Rome, on 7 March 1999, Pope John Paul II said: “Nicolas Barré tirelessly sought to lead both the people he directed and the charitable teachers to the prayer of the heart, inspired by contemplation of the inexpressible mystery of God Who out of love became a human being and even a little child.”

Today, we celebrate his legacy of faith and love which has formed so many young Singaporean women throughout the generations. Join the IJ community in praying the Mass at 8pm on YouTube.

The Rosary: A Sanctifying Repetition

8 October 2021

|

Tags: Educators, Parents, Students

|

Categories: Homilies / Messages, Reflections

The Rosary: A Sanctifying Repetition

In school, teachers often repeat learning points so that they will sink into our heads and hopefully surface when required. As we study at home, we memorise and exercise knowledge through repetition. This also applies to muscle memory, as exemplified in the 1984 movie The Karate Kid. Musicians, dancers and athletes train for hours, going through the same motions over and over again, until they perfect their performances. Acquiring basic life skills like cooking, riding a bicycle or driving a car also entails repetition, until the actions and knowledge involved become second nature.

The same principle applies in the spiritual life. In Jewish custom, ancient prayers like the Psalms are recited every day. Catholic monks and nuns continued this tradition through reciting the Divine Office eight times a day, praying all 150 Psalms every week in the Middle Ages. As laypeople were mostly illiterate and could not learn the psalms, they began to pray 150 Hail Mary‘s in honour of the Incarnation (based on Luke 1:28 and Luke 1:42), interspersed with the Our Father and Glory Be to the Holy Trinity. These are said while contemplating the principle events in the lives of Jesus and Mary. The Rosary is a thoroughly scriptural prayer.

In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus cautioned us not to pray “vain repetitions as the Gentiles do” (Matthew 6:7). He was an observant Jew and would certainly have memorised the Psalms through many days of prayer; indeed, He quotes them while dying on the cross. In this Gospel, He was warning His disciples against the superstitious ways of the pagans, whose idea of prayer and sacrifice was simply to appease their capricious gods by saying the “right” words, regardless of their inner dispositions.

 

Jesus goes on to teach His disciples to repeat His personal prayer, which we know as the Our Father or the Lord’s Prayer. In this prayer, we address God intimately, identifying ourselves as His children. The Our Father contains the four cardinal points of prayer: adoration, supplication, repentance and thanksgiving. By reciting this prayer with sincerity, we learn how to speak with God the Father as Jesus does; we are drawn into the divine life of the Holy Trinity. This simple prayer is so rich that the early Church Father Origen wrote a whole treatise on it.

Archbishop Fulton Sheen reflected on the Rosary:

‘The beautiful truth is that there is no repetition in, “I love you.” Because there is a new moment of time, another point in space, the words do not mean the same as they did at another time or space.

Love is never monotonous in the uniformity of its expression. The mind is infinitely variable in its language, but the heart is not. The heart of a man, in the face of the woman he loves, is too poor to translate the infinity of his affection into a different word. So the heart takes one expression, “I love you,” and in saying it over and over again, it never repeats. It is the only real news in the universe. That is what we do when we say the Rosary, we are saying to God, the Trinity, to the Incarnate Saviour, to the Blessed Mother: “I love you, I love you, I love you.”

Each time it means something different because, at each decade, our mind is moving to a new demonstration of the Saviour’s love.’

This month of October is the Month of the Holy Rosary. Even if you cannot commit to five decades a day – which takes about fifteen to twenty minutes – try meditating on one decade a day, perhaps while travelling to school. St Louis de Monfort suggested: “In each mystery, after the word Jesus, add a word to recall and honour the particular mystery. For example: Jesus incarnate, Jesus sanctifying, etc. as it is indicated at each decade.”

As St Josemaría Escrivá said: “Blessed be that monotony of Hail Mary’s which purifies the monotony of your sins!” The Dominican friar Lacordaire observed: “For Christians, the first of books is the Gospel and the Rosary is actually the abridgement of the Gospel.” Deepen your relationship with God and His mother with this timeless prayer.

The Art of Compassionate Accompaniment

27 September 2021

|

Tags: Educators, Parents, Students

|

Categories: Homilies / Messages, Reflections

The Art of Compassionate Accompaniment

September is the month of Our Lady of Sorrows, whose feast was celebrated on the 15th of this month, the day after the Feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross. Mother Mary, the first disciple of Christ from the moment He was incarnated in her womb, is the pre-eminent example of compassion, the ability to suffer with another person. Her Immaculate Heart was pierced by the sharp sword of sorrow as she watched her only son, her beloved God, suffer and die on Calvary.

Venerable Archbishop Fulton Sheen wrote in Calvary and the Mass:

“Have you ever remarked that practically every traditional representation of the Crucifixion always pictures Magdalene on her knees at the foot of the crucifix? But you have never yet seen an image of the Blessed Mother prostrate. John was there and he tells in his Gospel that she stood. He saw her stand. But why did she stand? She stood to be of service to us. She stood to be our minister, our Mother.

If Mary could have prostrated herself at that moment as Magdalene did, if she could have only wept, her sorrow would have had an outlet. The sorrow that cries is never the sorrow that breaks the heart. It is the heart that can find no outlet in the fountain of tears which cracks; it is the heart that cannot have an emotional break-down that breaks. And all that sorrow was part of our purchase price paid by our Co-Redemptrix, Mary the Mother of God!”

Today is the feast of St Vincent de Paul, a saint who also exemplifies compassion, known for his charitable works. Vincent’s father paid for his education by selling the family’s oxen. His father believed that a good ecclesiastical career would enable Vincent to be financially independent and help support his family.

Educated by Franciscan friars in France, the young Fr de Paul was captured by pirates and sold into slavery (like St Patrick). His third owner had forsaken Catholicism, but Fr de Paul brought him back to the faith; they fled by night over the sea to France, from whence Fr de Paul accompanied a cardinal to Rome. From there, in 1609 Fr de Paul was chosen to go on a secret mission to the court of Henry IV, King of France. That’s when he met Queen Marguerite and became her almoner, that is, a chaplain who is in charge of distributing money to the poor.

In 1617, Fr de Paul established confraternities of charity for the spiritual and physical relief of the poor and sick of each parish. From these, with the help of St. Louise de Marillac, came the Daughters of Charity, “whose convent is the sickroom, whose chapel is the parish church, whose cloister is the streets of the city.”

Fr de Paul organised the rich women of Paris to collect funds for his missionary projects, founded several hospitals, collected relief funds for the victims of war and ransomed over 1,200 galley slaves from North Africa. Fr de Paul reflected:

“It is not sufficient for me to love God if I do not love my neighbour. I belong to God and to the poor. God loves the poor, and consequently He loves those who have an affection for the poor. For when we love anyone very much, we also love his friends.”

The Daughters of Charity were long renowned for their work in orphanages, homes for the aged, and hospitals. They were the first active Order created for women and their particular style of dress reflected the clothes worn by peasant women in St. Vincent’s native Normandy. Yet their most important contribution, perhaps, is the fact that they were among the first professional nurses. Until Florence Nightingale came around with the Red Cross, nursing was strictly an occupation that was left to women religious and others who could share in their work. In this, the Daughters of Charity were truly pioneers.

Here is a description of them:

The Daughter of Charity is one of the sights of Paris, the city of her birth. She is more omnipresent than the gendarme. In her billowing blue gown and white headdress she walks the boulevards, the back streets, the alleys. She descends into the depths of the metro and climbs to the heights of the garret.

She is never without the huge market basket slung over one arm, and packed with the foods and medicines of her trade, nor the black cotton protect her starched white linen from the sudden rain. She moves ceaselessly, silently, seemingly unaware of the bustle and roar about her, seeking her quarry; and her quarry is always the same: the poor, the hungry poor, the sick poor, the evil poor – but always poor.

Her convent is the house of the sick, her cell the chamber of suffering, her chapel the parish church, her cloister the streets of the city or the wards of the hospital; obedience is her enclosure, the fear of God her grate, and modesty her veil.

May we learn from St Vincent de Paul and his Daughters of Charity to be truly compassionate disciples of Christ, bearing love for every person. As the hymn to his compatriot Father Nicholas Barré says:

“Touch many hearts to follow in your footsteps
To dedicate their lives to youth and poor
Drawn by the Lord to make Christ known and loved
Fill us with zeal, humility and faith
Pure love and strength and courage without fear
To keep your spirit alive in our hearts.”

Such compassion is the fruit of a truly Catholic education.

 

 

View All Posts